I know I'm jinxing myself to say that at this point in this pregnancy, I'm feeling the best I've ever felt out of all three of my experiences.
As I'm birthing at the same hospital as my midwife for the first time, we've actually discussed a labour plan, so far as you can plan for things!
This pregnancy I've gained 9kg. This is amazing in comparison to my first (25kg... Can you say "cupcakes for two"?) and my second (19kg) and so I'm hoping that I will feel better and recover easier afterwards. My boys have been 9lbs 8ozs and 9lbs 3ozs so I
I've lost my vision twice in one day this pregnancy and am awaiting my neurologist appointment. I think I have idiopathic intercranial hypertension which is scary and I'm praying that it won't return like in my other pregnancies. Seeing your children with no heads is horrible.
Being diagnosed with Gestational Diabetes at 30 weeks pregnant has actually been a blessing to me. I've watched what I've eaten very carefully as I'm controlling it by diet, and felt so much healthier as a result. We have a stay in the hospital afterwards and careful monitoring in labour and at birth because of the condition to ensure we are both safe.
Trisomy 21. There's a chance that our little bundle of blue will be born with an extra chromosome and have Down Syndrome. We're as prepared as we can be to meet any additional needs that he might have, like any baby has.
Jensen took four days, Lyoto took four hours...so who knows how long this baby will take! My midwife has told me to get to the hospital as soon as I'm sure things are in motion as Lyoto came when I was only 8cm dilated.
Atmosphere: Shhh! I like it quiet. I like silence when I'm in pain. I like to close my eyes, put my head down and deal with it whilst I simultaneously break my husband's hand. I can't handle coaching or praise when I'm in pain.
Mobility: I like to move around when I'm hurting (or sit on the toilet, how graceful...but it's where Jensen was nearly born as it was so comfortable). As I'll be hurting a lot, I'll be moving a lot. I've had midwives with matrix like abilities work with me, but in each labour I've had to have the little clip on my boy's head so that they can keep a check on his heart rate. This was important for Jensen because he took SOOO long to be born (four days) and Lyoto as there was meconium (but he didn't swallow it). So we'll see how we go this time.
Pain Relief: Entonox again (gas and air). This won't take the pain away if you're considering it, but having to concentrate on breathing through the tube (that you can also bite as hard as you like on) is great, and when your contraction is over, you're left feeling like you're having the best night out ever. Apparently I'm very amusing on gas and air.
More serious pain relief will only be accepted if there needs to be surgical intervention (which I pray there won't be).
Tearing: I've torn twice (how lovely for you all to know that). First degree with Jensen and second with Lyoto. Apparently I might tear less or not at all this time. Who knows. My babies have huge heads at birth (37cm, 39cm). I think of my downstairs like a beautiful rose that was stamped on in full bloom. NEVER, EVER look down there after birth. E.V.E.R.
Much to the mister's amusement, I have ice packs ready for my knickers. I recently offered him the use of them for his injured knee at jiu jitsu because I'm so kind.
The mister is my birthing partner. He's fantastic. This is the smooshy part. He answers all questions on my behalf and knows my weaknesses, and most importantly, he knows my heart. He's like a labour guard. No matter how many times I try and convince him and my midwife at transition that I DO need those drugs, that I'll take any drugs, or I'm going home because I've had enough, he knows how upset I would be had I had those drugs in previous pregnancies and it's the only time he really talks to me in labour, to calm me down and reassure me.
This time I've asked my Mum to be in the room. I really hope that she makes it in time from the Midlands. My mum has never seen a baby being born as she was unconscious for both of her births, being very poorly indeed. So I would love for her to be there to see him come into the world.
When it finally takes place, Gavin will cut the cord all being well, and our baby will be rubbed down and placed skin to skin with me and I'll breastfeed him as soon as he's ready. Lyoto came out ready and wiggled his way up my body, and Jensen was too exhausted and did not want to know for over a day. This baby needs to feed as soon as he can because of my diabetes.
We're having a managed third stage as I have had with my other two pregnancies especially because of the diabetes (which essentially means an injection and my placenta being removed manually by the midwife rather than waiting for it to be expelled naturally).
I'm staying in hospital again. I have to spend two days there at least whilst the baby and I are checked for diabetes and also because of my anxiety medication, our baby will be monitored for any signs of it being in his system. I'm hoping it will be restful to stay in hospital but in truth I know it will be at least two lonely nights of pacing the ward with our little guy and wishing that Gavin could stay, whilst worrying about the boys at home. I'm praying this little bundle of blue loves to sleep more than his brothers did (and do).
So....we're ready, and very excited to meet our nameless little one!